Take a Tumble!

I don't know whether to keep this blog or stick with my new found love for tumblr.... If you want to follow me on there, which I update quite often it's um... damn... hold on...

VOILA!

http://selfantagonist.tumblr.com/

Yeah, check me out! I enjoy it more than blogger because it suits my ADD...However I haven't figured

Anywho, I'm sorry I haven't posted on here but I'm trying to set my adult life up folks.

Work+Place for the pup and I to live are slowly but surely coming together as one. I keep changing my mind about being on the Eastcoast, but I don't know if jobs do a transfer thing before you even start.

I've entered the world of making choices.

No Time to Post

That is...no time for a real post.

Looking for a place to live, trying to sleep, significant other semi-drama, family-semi drama, refusal to take iron vitamins so my anemia is making me it's bitch...

I'll be back eventually folks.

In Recent News

Okay, this one is going to be quick...like most of my recent posts... anywho.

Got my hair relaxed, and new bangs cut...fly

Job interview tomorrow...doing research on the place of work this evening...not nervous...not excited...don't know how to feel

I'm in a relationship with The Sir again... that story is still developing.

If I do get said job... I shall be looking for apartments in the area.

So...

One of my greatest childhood friends went canoeing with another great friend and there was an accident. One tried to save the other, but there was a current and it took him away. The body was found and he is deceased.

I wish death would take a vacation...

leave me alone

Lemon Detox Diet Day 1

Okay, so I've officially started the Master Cleanse.. Before I can even begin to drink that lemonade concotion i just made, I have to do the salt water flush. I'm drinking it right now: 2 teaspoons of uniodized sea salt and a quart of warm water.

Directions say to stay close to the restroom afterwards and well I have nothing else to do today... Why am I doing this to my body?

I shall return to my old athletic self when I'm done, but first I want to clean out my system and start with a fresh body...not with this old baggage I've acquired. I'm perfectly fine with my weight... I'm not overweight so I'm good. I simply want to go down in inches more than pounds. I don't know if I want to go back to a size 6 but I'd be fine at a seven or eight. Also, my chin is acquiring a siamese twin... I do not approve

While I type this, I can feel the trouble brewing...

I have a little under 16 ounces left to drink... it tastes awful.
Weirdly enough I'm starting at 2:20pm so I will have to do the 24 hour cycle as so, or I may skip this flush thing tomorrow and do it again in the morning following
but I'll keep you guys posted...

Reboot

Today my friend's mother passed away. She stated it this morning on facebook. I'm not sure how to handle a situation like that when the person isn't physically close to me. I'm emotionally stunted. I am the Meredith Grey of the real world...simply no emotional connection especially when it comes to death. However, I AM a listener. Anyone that knows me knows I'm an excellent listener. I speak better when I write or type so I sent her a text expressing my condolences but if she ever wants to just vent, I will totally listen. Sometimes you just need someone who isn't going to say anything, just listen...and I've always been that person.

Ironically this post was originally going to be about the movie Death at a Funeral, but right now it's simply not appropriate. Have a good day folks.

Jay-Z, Devil Worshipping, Gaga, Blah Blah, Rihanna, Satan & The Gang Edition

It annoys me when people discuss that "illuminati" business with celebrities. Since people haven't noticed this is America. Hypothetically if they are all doing so, they have the right to. Isn't that one of those freedoms in the bill of rights? If not, which is more than likely not...all you have to do is stop listening to it. Take this into consideration....Devil worshipping is done in many ways because all sin is of Satan. Pimping is devil worshipping. Fornication is devil worshipping. Murder is devil worshipping. Addiction to money is devil worshipping. Lying is devil worshipping. Robbing is devil worshipping. Adultery is devil worshipping.

You have had to fall into one of those categories. And now now children there's no double standard when it comes to religion. So STFU

That is all.

I Don't Take My Writing Seriously

This is terrible... I know I should but when I write a piece of crap 30 minutes before a deadline and it pretty much murders any of the competition, I lose interest in striving for the best. This needs to stop. Sigh...

I Wanna See If This Actually Works

RULES:
1. Put Your iTunes/iPod, Windows Media Player (etc…) on Shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button, and the title of that song is your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS
4. Put any comments in [brackets] after the song name


Are you male or female?
The Way You Make Me Feel- Michael Jackson

Describe yourself!
Turn Off The Lights-Teddy Pendergrass

What do people feel when they’re around you?
U and Ur Hand-Pink [Sadly, this is true... I love my hand...]

Describe your current relationship.
Coachella 3- Travis Barker & DJ AM

Where would you like to be now?
Theme From Jaws....[Shark infested waters is where I want to be?]

How do you feel about love?
My Love-Jill Scott

What’s your life like?
I've Got To See You Again-Norah Jones

What would you wish for if you had only one wish?
Saving All My love For You- Whitney Houston

Say something wise.
Waiting on The World To Change-John Mayer

If someone says “Is this okay?” You say,
I Can't Stop Loving You-Michael Jackson

How would you describe yourself?
Cherish-Kool and the Gang

What do you look for in a guy/girl?
Close The Door-Teddy Pendergrass[This thing is making me sound like a nympho]

How do you feel today?
There Is-Boxcar Racer

What is your life’s purpose?
Time Warp-Rocky Horror Picture Show

What is your motto?
Phonte Speaks-Little Brother

What do your friends think of you?
California Dreaming-Mamas and the Papas

What do you think of your parents?
Bout To Be Some-Tanya Morgan

What do you think about very often?
Paralyzer-Finger Eleven

What is 2 + 2?
Fiesta-R. Kelly ft. Jay-Z

What do you think of your best friend?
The Leak Freestyle...some mixtape

What do you think of the person you like?
Trap Star-Young Jeezy

What is your life story?
Bad Day-Daniel Powter

What do you want to be when you grow up?
Theme of Nightmare On Elm Street....Bahahahaha

What do you think of when you see the person you like?
Down With The Sickness-Disturbed

What will you dance to at your wedding?
Darkside Of The Moon[complete album on one track]-Pink Floyd (That's true! I want to dance to Us and Them)

What will they play at your funeral?
Silent Night-Temptations

What is your hobby/​​interest?
Death Egg Zone Act 2- Sonic & Knuckles

What is your biggest fear?
Runaway-Janet Jackson

What is your biggest secret?
Prescription-Wale

What do you think of your friends?
Don't Get Around Much Anymore-Louis Armstrong & Duke Ellington

Sooo, I guess I like love and stuff....

That's Life

When I first started college my major was Philosophy/Pre-Law. It’s a major parents generally shed a tear of joy for because that means they get to rub it in people’s faces. The masses? When they here it they give the “Oooh,” you know the oh…the “My kid’s just a humanities major oh.” So my first semester, I took some gen eds and one philosophy class. It was boring. Beyond the big bank to be made, there was the family aspect. I was going to be a divorce attorney. Lawyers generally spend hours beyond hours on cases; they are generally on call. My main priority of the future is to be an awesome mom. “On call” can’t work. I gave up my top three dream jobs for this reason: Neurosurgeon, Marine Biologist, and Architect.
Eventually my major was history, because I love American History. It’s apart of me, my kids will bleed American knowledge just as much if not more than I do. They will have no choice. Ha. Anyway, I eventually got lazy when it came to school and decided to take the easy way out. I became an English major. In being an English major, I’d write, every English class ever I’d take, I’d accept nothing less than an A…or A-…whichever is the lowest. If anyone said it best, it was Hank Hill, “Bobby, you got an F in English…you speak English Bobby.” I don’t know why but that quote is one of the funniest things I’ve ever heard and well, I love it.
Career wise? I’d always have teaching to fall back on. Teaching is awesome. I dig kids, and my resume is full of kid stuff so, it’s bound to happen I suppose.
*Sidenote, I’m flipping the channels while I type this and they showed Bruce Jenner when he was young, boy that’s a sexy man. Haha. Anyway
No matter what I end up doing, my family will be first. Something funny, I’m currently single so I’m not even thinking about incubating a human being for 9 months right now. The father and I will eventually meet up, and figure out we can put up with each other for the rest of our lives…then we’ll tie the knot and start the circle of life. Idealistically my first born will be born sometime in 2013. Idealistically I will be married sometime before then. 2012? I guess…because 2011 is next year and that may be a tad too soon, but I dunno, things like that you can’t plan.
This is all coming up because I’ve reached the home stretch. I will be graduating from high maintenance spoiled kid university and I’m somewhat excited. We have two graduations so that’s weird. I’m deciding where to live after grad, if I do stay in the states, I’ve considered working abroad. I don’t know. If I do, there’s only one country I’m set on, so if not there, then here in the U S of A. I’ve already picked a city. The thought of all of this is nerve racking so I’m already giving myself a six month break after grad for the sake of my sanity.

I'm Still Awake

It's 4:29am and I'm still awake. I'm doing school work for later today. All I have left is a presentation for the class I have to teach today and a reading response for my poetry class but after that I am done. I'm running on E as of right now; not fumes yet but E. I'll refuel from noon-2:40, so that should put my body at a quarter of a tank but I will have the biggest tude, I'm talking a tude like America had when Japan attacked Pearl Harbor. This isn't good since I have my longest class tomorrow and I have to work in groups with a woman I can't stand. If she were a baby I'd be the dingo that ate her.

It's that bad.

Anyway I told myself that if I made it to 5:00, I'd cook bacon, eggs, and fried potatoes. I'm almost done so I may get some sleep. My grandmother is going to call me at 8:15am to wake me up for my 9:00am class that I may not attend for the sake of sleep. I didn't go Monday which means next week I shall begin to attend EVERY class regularly. Right now I'm in an airport in Mexico so I can't make it because I don't land back here until Noon.

...That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Where Have I Been?

Spring break, parentals wanted me to be stress free so I was macless, which may hurt me academically but hey blame my parentals. It was painful at first, but not being in contact with the world was great. I'm going to watch my humans tonight. I've missed them, haven't seen them since early February. Four hours of fun and screaming babies. I'm pumped...

In other news my grandmother was a hooker for a church play...irony right?,

Anyway I have bigger things to deal with. I may get a visit tomorrow by a certain person and if I do good things will happen but bad things will be the outcome. I really don't need this stress right now but I'm going to call my guru who knows us mutually and get his take on the thing. Look for a good or bad story tomorrow night...

Rhinoceritis

Well, I have the rhinovirus. I feel I got it from a friend, but it's whatever. All I need is a little Alka Seltzer Plus and balloons... I'll be fine. I hope. I've already began Lysol-ing down the apartment just so my roommates won't get sick. I'm nice like that not really so what can I say? Sigh, here's to a long night.

Mmm My Favorite

This is by far my favorite short film. My friend showed it to me a couple of weeks ago and I finally found it to place here. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

Skhizein (Jérémy Clapin,2008) from Bertie on Vimeo.

My Life's Theme...

I will now attempt because I'm not paying attention in this class I'm in to make these potential life themes.

Professional Student: This is my last resort, and I would honestly never do it to myself but hell it needs to be a possibility. I do not want to be in college forever, that's just ridiculous.

Soccer mom: I pray to Bob that my kids won't want to play soccer. As much as I avoided attending games in high school, I'd like to not have to go and actually be interested... that's cruel and unusual. So we can change "Soccer" mom to "basketball" mom or some other indoor masculine if they're male contact sport... would I be stay at home or work my hindpart off...hehe, hindpart

Stay at Home mom: This one, I'm not anxious about....but totally prepared. I'm convinced I'm the 3rd best home-cooking chef in the world[next to my dad and his mom]...many people who've eaten my food agree. As far as cleaning, when I have to the room is immaculate...if I don't have to, I'll hire someone. I've always been somewhat of an oxymoron a traveling homebody...so I don't know if I'd necessarily be at home all of the time...I think I've watched Stepford Wives enough to grasp the concept of Home Executive Engineer...Antonio Banderas once said, "She needs to be honest, loyal, and young enough to bare children." So, Conceive, Cook, Sex, Hire Cleaning, Sex, Watch kids, Sex...hmm, is that one really that bad...We got this ladies


Working Wife & Mother, College Professor Edition: this is my actual aspiration, but I don't know if I want to profess at a community college or a 4 year university, if the latter, I'd probably only do entry level. I signed a contract with myself that I'd not acquire a degree above a Masters. I don't need Dr. infront of my name...and I know I'd be too lazy to write a dissertation. Even with my job, I'd manage my family...I feel like moms are family managers, I don't mean in a sense of property, just in a mean of keeping everything sane and organized for the family. Since manage sounds weird, I will say I would still devote a large amount of time to my family. And yay for nastytime with whoever my husband will be. And well, if something happens and I don't get my Masters...I'll teach high school or something...or find some career completely unrelated to my major...perhaps I'll work in a museum forever...

Military Wife: If for some reason I end up marrying some guy in the military, we will have to move around a lot I believe...and with my career choice it won't be that hard to find a job in our new city. I suppose I'm ready for that type of lifestyle...like most military mothers I'd try to make my kids's childhood as normal as possible. I have many cousins who are military brats and a few people I know...and well let's just say their concept of friendship is...different. They all also have some sort of attention seeking issue...I dunno... In the event my husband was deployed...well thats one aspect I can tell you I have no idea how I'd handle it. At this point I know I'd say something like, "Don't die, don't get so lonely you start giving or taking it in the ass nor sleeping with some random that didn't bare your children...Try not to get amputated our children are assholes like us and will probably make fun of you. I love you so much."

That's all I've got for now...but my current theme is College Student Stalling to Enter The Real World By Adding on A Minor> hey hey hey, I'm graduating a year early...sue me. I'm doing that whole self discovery thing, breaking the rules, ...well I've kind of always been a wild child...living life on the edge and whatnot ...oh yeah

P.S. I just noticed if you click the arrow on this blog that says "Sidebar" a bunch of other stuff I have shows up... if you didn't try it already...
Kudos for me for having no spelling errors in this entire entry.